The ever typical peace keeper, despite best efforts not to be, I find myself slipping into that role time and again. Boundaries were never something I learned. Growing up in an alcoholic home they just didn’t exist. I earned my gold medal in peacekeeping just to try to maintain some space between myself and the chaos that surrounded me. Unfortunately it’s a tough role to break…but I will continue to make it a work in progress.
I usually will get to the point of being in exhausted tears before I realize I haven’t held my boundaries and have overextended myself to please. The stress of people pleasing is finally outweighing everything. Once again, I’ve let myself down. Any of this sounding familiar? I suspect it does because I meet a number of others in this life who will tell me of similar circumstances. So what do I tell them and what do I tell myself?
1. FORGIVE YOURSELF
2. STOP IT!
I use to feel that I couldn’t, that it was too late, that people wouldn’t like it…yeah, the people pleaser raises it’s loud and ugly voice to say “What will others think of me?”. But the more important question is how will you feel about yourself if you don’t? I thought so…nail those things up if have to, but put them up.
3. Say NO
4. Celebrate you
Your only human and that is something to celebrate. Give yourself the pat on the back, the toast with champagne or whatever way you celebrate you!